Too often I have heard people say in response to fostering, “I could never do it. I would get too attached.” To those of you who might feel this way, I say – maybe you are the kind of person who should be involved. All children deserve to have someone love them, care for them and be attached to them… don’t they?
Deuteronomy 10:18-19 says, “He defends the cause of the fatherless and the widow, and loves the foreigner residing among you, giving them food and clothing. And you are to love those who are foreigners, for you yourselves were foreigners in Egypt.” As Christians, we are called to protect the vulnerable… but what does that mean in today’s world? I think it means that we all have a role to play in the protection. The reason Christ’s Church is so engaged in the foster care community is because every single person in our church can be involved. Now, this doesn’t mean that everyone should become certified foster parents, but it does mean that we should all care. My role? It’s looked different in a few seasons. Encouragement, rides to dance class, family meals, post-placement debrief, babysitting… the list goes on. Whatever the season, the Lord has revealed my role.
A few years ago, I felt a pull on my heart for foster care. I thought that I would take placements or provide respite, but I knew that I needed to do a few things before that could happen. I bought a house thinking I would fill it with foster children one day, but over the years, the Lord has shown me that it’s not yet time. I’ve always had a desire to be a mother and I thought this would be the outlet for me, but the Lord keeps saying “Not yet”. As frustrating as that still is at times, God has shown me that motherhood is not one size fits all. I didn’t have to wait around to get married and have biological children or take on long-term foster placements to be a mother, instead, I could be a loving mother figure in the lives of countless kids in my community today.
Community is messy and beautiful. To support and encourage our friends involved in foster care means a lot of unplanned events. A lot of times, I think our first reaction is to drop off a meal and leave them alone to navigate the first week of a placement or change. Great intentions, but have we also thought about the communal aspect of raising a family? Yes, dropping off meals can be such a blessing to a foster family, but couldn’t it also be a blessing to families for you to bring a meal and… stay? Hold a baby while mom and dad relax, let mom talk to another adult about the hard week she’s had, or just go to a park and do life together. Support can happen from afar and often needs to, but I want to challenge us to remember the importance of human interaction and that true care looks different for each family. We need to build deeper connections with those in our community so that these moments don’t feel so awkward.
Lastly, I think we need to remember that everyone wants to belong to a loving family. So why don’t we do our part to give every child the best example of Christ by showing them they can be part of the most important family ever. Whether your fostering friends have a placement for 2 days or 2 months, you can support them amidst it all. When you do life with a fostering family and walk through the good and the bad, you are providing a necessary support. Let’s do our part to support the families in our community with the resources we do have. Whether that be prayer, babysitting, mentoring an older child, providing meals, sharing meals, being a sponsor at a Foster night at Christ’s Church, donating supplies to Fostering Hope, and/or being an advocate for foster families – do it with all your heart. Love those kiddos with everything you’ve got, because why wouldn’t you?
Carryn Osborn
Carryn is a part of our Christ’s Church family and serves as a host with our creative team and Foster Care Communities. She is the Connection Lead at Schuber Mitchell Homes and enjoys planning events for her coworkers. Carryn loves to travel, spend time with her nephews, and play pickleball!
